Worth It

My Little Cookie Monster and i stayed up waaaaay to late past our bedtime last night.

That's because we both wanted to see Barrie's production of Peter Pan at the childrens theatre.

And it was great! The cast was amazing, and the actor that played Capt. Hook made the character lovable, which i realise is so totally not the point! There was even an actor dressed in a crocodile suit with a tick tocking tummy! L.O.V.E.D. IT!

And so did C.m., who proudly sat on the edge of her seat the whole time, except during intermission when all she did was desparately ask every 2 seconds, "Momma, is intermission oooovvvver yet?!?"

Thinking about it last night and this morning...it is something i want to do more of with her more often. We live in this hellaciously busy, crazy, sometimes not so great area, but we need to go out and experience the good things this area has to offer once in a while, right? Otherwise, we should move to a teeny tiny little place in the middle of Wyoming or somewhere......like the town my parents took me to when we visited Wyoming years ago and the citizens were so excited because it was the first time in 3 years they had kids graduating high school--all 4 of them. :o)

On the cusp of the New Year, like millions of other people, i was thinking about what could be done differently around here to make life more enjoyable.

One, being that we need to take C.m. to Seattle once in a while. Big cities are magical places...and if you aren't lucky enough to be the type of person who can slog it out in one, you can atleast visit once in awhile to experience it. It's always full of surprises. Like last night, for instance, when we were in the Center House looking for a quick bite before the show, we saw some people we remembered from the Christmas Cruise in Cd'A a couple weeks ago. They're Aussie on a US holiday, and they were sitting next to us on the boat. Someone else had their ear the entire time, telling them about all the things they missed along their trip (Americans...we really stick our foot in it sometimes, eh?) We stopped them last night and talked with them--this is one of many trips they've taken in the States. They love it and would move to Nashville in a minute. Daughters were married in Las Vegas. They've seen and done things in our country that i can only hope to get accomplished someday before my numbers up--drive Rte 66, tour the eastern seaboard, visit Nashville. They had been to Yellowstone, Jackson Hole, Boise, and Portland since we had seen them in Cd'A. Covered 4,000 miles so far and drove through their first snowstorm!

C.m. was soooo excited last night, she was wondering if Seattle was always that pretty. I didn't have the heart to tell her that if we had just been a few blocks down at the bus tunnels, things aren't so "pretty" down there unless you are a prostitute, drug dealer, or gang banger. We were on 5th Ave....the Ave on which Macy's and Nordstorm fight for customers. Where the monorail runs, Starbucks has it's flagship stand (and about 8 other caffeine refueling stations on 2 city blocks.) Martini bars, taco bars, cigar bars, and theatres rub up against one another. Just beyond are the old early 1900's buildings converted to beautiful little condos for "vintage living", as their billed, and at their doorsteps is the Seattle Center with the Space Needle all a-glow. C.m remarked that when she was a teenager or something, she would live there! :o) Didn't have the heart to tell her she wouldn't be able to have chickens in her condo. :o)

The other thing i am wrestling with this year is "owning" where i live. I hate where we live--it's that kind of place that if people hear where you live they say, "Eew, i'd never live there. Eeew!" It hasn't always been this bad apparently, but let's just say it isn't getting any better. Case in point, the pracitically nude coffee shop (that now has a neighbouring business just as bad called "Pole Fitness"--where you too can get in shape by learning to dance like a stripper!) :o\ Last night, on our way home from dropping off library books, i notice that the signboard for the coffee place reads, "Feelin' Nippy? So are we." UGH! I bet the fine people of Inuvik, NT don't have to put up with this crud! Then again, someone would have to be off your rocker to open up a scantily clad drive thru coffee place in the NW Territories! WA might as well be like that though, it's not like we've got pleasent year round weather like AZ! But with the whole econ crisis, there is absolutely nowhere to move--lots of people in our area are in the same boat. We own modest houses, we'd like to move up a little, but there is nothing on the market that is affordable for our kind and to boot, there is currently very few people who can afford a modest family home--or at least qualify for loans for them like they used to. Grrr. And i know the minute we decide to stay and put up a fence and make this place "work" as a little urban homestead in the 'burbs is when we'll find something affordable and won't be able to move because this place will have too many unfinished projects. Like i said, Grrrr! But there comes a point when it's more detrimential to sit and say, "i can't wait till this, i can't wait till that" and putting your whole life on hold, eh? I don't want to become so bitter that i can't even find reasons to get out of bed in the morning because i'm so depressed about where we live, what we didn't do, yada, yada, yada.

Also speaking of worth it.....the other thing i've been thinking about a lot lately is my health. I'm pretty happy with myself, that's is until i look in a mirror and don't recognise the person or those fat ankles looking back at me. I know exactly when and how i put on these 150 pounds i need to take off (as soon as i found out Starbucks Choco Chunk Cookies were 11 points, er aka the number of calories in a healthy, filling meal, there was no point in prolonging the inevitable breakup that was brewing--no pun intended.) But what i'm not so certain of is the why. Why did i let myself get this fat?? I know my weight will be a life long challenge, but right now, i've just got to focus on chisellin' a little chunk off the chunky, you know? I've been thinking a lot lately about why i let my waistline get this outta hand? But since that is a truly depressing thought to me and the more i think about it the more down on myself i get, i try not to think about it. Thinking about why you're not happy truely doesn't help you get any happier, eh? (Reasons for unhappiness???! See above re: humble family home near unabashedly crude "business" district.)

Recently at my WW meeting, an acquaintance gave me a bookmark entitled "If I Lost 1 lb Each Week of 2010...." and then it lists all the holidays and how much weight could be lost by each. Just thinking about it amazes me. I'm trying to remind myself of each time i go for the fridge or cupboard. But mostly, i am trying to convince myself that i could do it!!

I'm thinking if i could personalise it just a little bit more, it might make it easier for me to remember, so here goes....

Feb 3rd...my 9th anniversary. Moose's "Ball and Chain" would be five pounds lighter!!

Feb 14th...Valentine's Day. I would be lovin' the fact that i was 7 pounds lighter!

Mar 17th...St. Patty's Day. I would be 11 lbs lighter...which coincidently is about the size of a leperchaun!

Mar 26....Mom and Me Tea at Meeker Mansion. I would be 12 lbs lighter for our second annual mom and daughter tea. 12 pounds lighter than the last one!

Apr 4....Easter. 14 lbs lighter -- maybe i could do the bunny hop then!

Apr 22nd....Moose's Birthday. We could celebrate his birthday and my weighing 16 lbs less with crab cakes instead of birthday cake! Anyone know how candles work in crab cakes? :o)

May 9...Mother's Day. 19 lbs less of me--well on my way to becoming one hot momma (or momma to another lil sweet pea--even better!!!)

June 1st...Happy B/D to me--especially because i would be 22 pounds lighter. On my way to lookin' more and more like Marilyn Monroe each day (whom, incidently, shares the same birthday as me.)

June 21....Summer Solstice. I'd be 25 lbs lighter, which would really help with all those late night gardening chores!

July 4th...Independance Day. 27 lbs down. There's a reason to celebrate with some fireworks!

July 25th....an ordinary Sunday would become the day i lose 10%! 30 lbs....that's a whole mess of potatoes!

Aug 15th...such a boring month is Aug. However, with 33 lbs down, i could make it exciting by shopping for some new clothes!! I'd be needing them by then!

Sept 4th..."Wear A Cute Apron" Day....with 35 lbs down, maybe i could even tie it in the front?!?

Oct 11...Columbus Day.... 41 lbs down would be like discovering a whole new me!!

Oct 31st ...Hallowe'en... with 44 lbs lost, i'd have the best looking costume i've had in a long while--a healthier, slimmer me!

Nov 7th... Cookie Monster's b/d... i'd be 46 lbs lighter and while we would be celebrating our little one's day, i would secretly be celebrating the fact that i could rest assured that i would be here for many more celebrations to come!

Nov 25th ... Thanksgiving & 47lbs lighter. A whole lot to be thankful for, wouldn't you say? Please, don't pass the gravy!

Dec 25th ... Christmas... i'd be 51 lbs lighter. That's the best Christmas present i could get, and ain't nobody can give it to me but myself!!

and by New Year's Eve, i could be 52 lbs lighter...not only would i be celebrating the New Year, but also rejoicing in the fact that i had reached my goal of 250 lbs, that would allow us to be able to try to have another baby in 2011, as i'd be the same weight i was when we found out we were pregnant with C.m. Talk about a celebration!!!!